Everyone’s probably had that feeling where they just don’t quite fit in with their friends, family, social group. Kind ofthat feeling where something just ddoesn’t feel quite right, like there’s always an awkwardness, a something that can’t really be explained but is there anyways. Maybe it’s the feeling of not really being wanted, that feeling that you were just invited because they felt bad not inviting you, or just because they’ve always invited you. Maybe there’s that pressure to go out, to go do something when you’d really rather not. Don’t get me wrong, I absoutely love all my friends back home, they are some of the best people I know and are my closest friends, I don’t know what I’d do without them.
But for the first time in what seems like my entire social life I feel like I fit in with a group of people, not just one or two amazing human beings. It could be that we are all in the same job, like the same things, are all slightly obsessed with climbing, all have choosen to stray off that beaten path. Whatever it is, this random group of people have never made me feel more at home or at ease in a foreign country or in any country. I may be miles and miles from anything familiar, but it already seems like I’ve known these guys for years.
I feel like I’m one of the cool kids, as stupid as that sounds, the feeling that I’ve found somewhere I can fit in amazes me. Ever since that stage where kids realize who the weirdos are and begin to seperate into groups, I’ve always felt like I’ve never really been able to find my group. I mix here and there, pretending to be in this group or that group, but nothing thats made me feel like I really belong somewhere.
Maybe this is what every other person feels like when they find where they belong, or maybe everyone already knows so it never hits them in a jolt. For me, arriving in hot, humid, loud, busy, sometimes chaotic Vietnam has given me such a sense of belonging. I really don’t even have words to describe how happy I really am here. I’ve found somewhere where i can be myself and fit it. People seek me out, ask me to hang out, I dont feel like I’m bothering anyone by asking them to hang out. I can be as social or unsocial as I want and feel absoutely no pressure to do anything. Everyone here understands the need to travel, the need to see beyond just the small corner of the earth we are born into. As much as I love all my closest friends, the feeling of belonging and happiness and peace here is just sometmething that still shocks me.
It shocks me how much I really feel at home here. It shocks me that I can feel this way and feel so comfortable around a group of people who are essentially strangers. I wasn’t aware that people could so easily fit in with others. It’s really something so special and amazing and I’m so glad I finally found it.